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Em Am Em Am Em I'm counting back the number of the steps Am Em B7 C B7 it took for me to get back on the wagon of the weekend Em Am Em Am G I'll use the autotimer to prove that I'll Am C D get home with my imagination G Am C D if they find the body in the basement G Am C D in the very house that she was raised in Em Am Em Am Em I'm taking down the number of the times Am Em B7 C B7 so when we get the sign from god I'll be the first to call them Em Am Em Am G I'm taking back the number of the beast Am C D cause six is not a pretty number G Am C D eight or three are definitely better G Am C D A is for the address on the letter G Am C D Em Am Em Am B7 to my alcoholic friends Em Am Em Am Em I'm trying hard not to be ashamed Am G Am C D not to know the name of who is waking up beside me G Am C D or the date, the season, or the city G Am C D but at least the ceiling's very pretty G Am C D and if you are holding it against me Em B7 C B7 I'll be on my best behavior Em B7 C B7 taking shots for mother nature Em B7 C B7 once my fist is in the cupboard Em B7 C B7 love is never falling over (repeat intro riff) Em Am B7 G Am C D Should I choose a noble occupation? G Am C D If I did I'd only show up late and G Am C D sick and they would tear at me with hatred G Am C D plus my only natural talent's wasted G Am C D G on my alcoholic friends Am C D G my alcoholic friends Am C D G the party never ends Am C D Em my alcoholic friends