Oops, an error
Loading. Please wait.

The Loophole Ukulele Chords

1,317 views 12 this week
no commentswrite comment
1 2 3 4 5
excellent!
x 3
Autoscroll
+/-
esc
set tempo
stop
Difficulty
novice
Hey! There's an official Ultimate Guitar app which is ideal
for learning songs when you're away from computer. Get the app
WARNING: You are trying to view
                                    content from Ultimate-Guitar.com
                                    in an unauthorized application,
                                    which is prohibited.

                                    Please use an official Ultimate
                                    Guitar Tabs application for iPhone,
                                    iPad or Android to access legitimate
                                    chords, guitar, bass, and drum tabs
                                    from Ultimate-Guitar.com database.

                                    Type "ultimate guitar tabs" in Apple
                                    App Store's or Android Market's
                                    search to find the application.
Garfunkel and Oates - The Loophole

**Capo 3rd**

C                        F
All my life I've been good
C                                       G
Do what my mom and dad and God say I should
 
C                         F
Go to church and Bible School
G                   C
To live by God's rule
 
Am
So whatever people tell me
Am                   G
That The Bible tells me
C
I will do
 

C                                   F
Walk the halls at my school with my purity ring
Am                                  D
Unlike those other girls, I've got my morals in check
C                          F
It was easy to do until I got a boyfriend
Am                             D
And pardon my French, but he's cute as heck
 
C             F
And I made a pact
C             F
To keep my hymen intact
F                    G
And Jesus and I are tight
 
C                        F
Never learned about the birds and the bees
Am                                    D
I was taught to keep an aspirin in between my knees
C                                       F
'Cause The Bible says premarital sex is wrong
Am                             D
But Jason says that guys can't wait that long
 
F                   C
I don't want to lose him
F                   C
To someone who'll do him
F                           G
I need to figure something out
 

C                                               F
Well there's a loophole in The Scripture that works really well
         Am                    D 
So I can get him off without going to hell
C                   F
It's my Hail Mary, full of grace
       Am                         D 
In Jesus' name we go to fifth base!

Am                          D 
Oh thank you for making me holy
Am                                  D
And thank you for giving me holes to choose from
F                            G
And since I'm not a godless whore
F                                G
He'll have to come in the back door
Therefore

 
Chorus:
C                                F
Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus
Am                           F      G
The good Lord would want it that way
C               D             F           D
Get that sweet sensation a throbbing rationalization


F                        G 
It's just between you and me
F                               G                C
'Cause everyone knows it's the sex that God can't see
 
C                  F 
It's hard to be as pure as me
Am                            G
To resist the urge to lose my vaginal virginity
C                   F
To wait until my marriage bed
Am                             G
To give my husband my unsullied maiden head


F             C 
So take your cock out
F            C
Shove it in my ass
F            G
Fuck me until you come
 
        F                    C
Oops! I mean let's join our souls
F                C
And unite our bodies
F                         G
And fly with the wings of God


C                                   F
Whatever you do, don't touch my clitoris
Am                                         G
If you ring Satan's doorbell, God can't ignore this


C                                 F
And no prophylactics when you put it in
Am                                        D
'Cause birth control's for sluts and it's a sin


F                C
I've emptied my bowels
F                 C
And laid out the towels
F               G
I'm ready for romance


C                               F
Now I'm praying to the Power that's the Highest
Am                                 G
But of all of my holes, this ones the driest
 

C                           F
And we can't procreate if we anal copulate
Am                              D
And God is OK with sodomy, but only if you're straight


F                     C
And I'm staying pure, no matter what
F                      G
So I'm OK with everything butt
Everything butt
Everything butt
Whoa-oh
 
Chorus:
C                        F
Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus
Am                           F   G
The good Lord would want it that way
C              D             F        D
Get that sweet sensation a rock hard rationalization
 
F                       G 
It's just between you and me
F                              G                  C
'Cause everyone knows it's the sex that God can't see
 
Am                       D
I do whatever The Bible tells me to
Am                             G
Except for the parts that I choose to ignore
Am                             G
Because they're unrealistic and inconvenient
Am                      D
But the rest I live by for sure
 

F                                                   G         
So let's not talk about how the Good Book bans shellfish, polyester and divorce
F                                           G
And how it condones slavery and killing gays because those parts don't happen of course
D                                                       F 
Let's cherry-pick the part about losing my cherry and (line up for ambiguities as omissions?)
 G                             Am
And circumvent any real sacrifice, and still feel pious in my arbitrary parroted 
D
positions

C                  G                Am 
And don't you dare question my convictions
D                                   F
And don't look closely at the contradictions
C                     G                   Am
And just focus on the sacrificial crucifixion
D                                     F
And have faith in its complete jurisdiction

D
As the only way to measure if you're good or not
And when you're in a debate, just say to “have faith”
                                                                                                G
Because when you're up against logic it's the only card you've got
 
F
So close your eyes
G
Take a deep breath
And..
 
Chorus:
C                      F
Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus
Am                         F      G
The good Lord would want it that way
C             D             F           D
Get that sweet sensation an irrational rationalization


F                      G 
It's just between you and me
F                 G                            D
'Cause everyone knows it's the sex that God can't see
F                        G
Yeah, my chastity belt has locks
F                  G                        C
So sometimes you need to think outside the box
comments
We did not receive enough feedback on this tab! Please rate:
print report bad tab
1 2 3 4 5
I want to post or [tab]
guest
You may want to rate the tab now too:
select rating
Please do not post tabs as comments. Select "correction" instead!