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Am Once upon time E on the Internet there was a guy F C a very deepy flawed man E Am they called him Eric Bauman F C he was a total asshole G E Am and nobody knows why Am he traveled all around E on the pulse of each phenomenon F C from Something Awful on to Fark E Am with his trusty watermark F C he stole and stuck it all upon G E Am Ebaumsworld.com F it wasn't fair C E Am to those from whom he stole F but did he care? C E no not one bit F C and then he had the nads E Am to sell some ads F C what a piece of shit E Am oh, Eric Am Eric's quite a slut E other people's work has made him rich F C he hired some male prostitutes E Am dressed them up three-piece suits F C his faithful team of lawyers G E Am made the Internet his bitch Am 'til Lowtax came along E punched him in the face and banged his mom F C and Mr. Bauman, quite disgraced, E Am had his dumb website erased F C well, sadly that's a lie, G E Am there's still an Ebaumsworld.com F C but if we all join hands E Am and sing this song F C E then our call will reach the sky F C and maybe Zeus and Thor E Am will smite that whore F C I think it's worth a try A G Ebaumsworld is going down D E we gotta rise up from the underground A G and tell Eric Bauman a thing or two D E bout how stealing simply isn't cool A G so right now we're making that our mission D E and if that bastard doesn't listen A G we'll get sick of being lawful D E A and brand his ass with "SOMETHING AWFUL"