Eb Eb/D C G# A# Right now you are down and out and feeling really crappy Eb Eb/D And when I see how sad you are C# C It sort of makes me...Happy! F Bb Sorry, Nicky, human nature- Eb D C# C Nothing I can do! G# A# It's...Schadenfreude! G# A A# Eb Making me feel glad that I'm not you. Well that's not very nice, Gary! Bb C# I didn't say it was nice! But everybody does it! Eb Eb/D C G# A# You ever clap when a waitress falls and drops a tray of glasses? Eb Eb/D C# C And ain't it fun to watch figure skaters falling on their asses? F Bb And don't ya feel all warm and cozy, Eb D C# C Watching people out in the rain! G# A# That's...Schadenfreude! G# A A# Eb People taking pleasure in your pain! Oh, Schadenfreude, huh? What's that, some kinda Nazi word? Bb C# Bb C# Yup! It's German for "happiness at the misfortune of others!" Bb C# "Happiness at the misfortune of others." That is German! E Eb C# A B Watching a vegetarian being told she just ate chicken E Eb D C# Or watching a frat boy realize just what he put his dick in! F# B E D C# Being on the elevator when somebody shouts "Hold the door!" A B "No!!!" Schadenfreude! A A# B E "Fuck you lady, that's what stairs are for!" A Straight-A students getting Bs B Exes getting STDs! C# Waking doormen from their naps! A B Watching tourists reading maps! A Football players getting tackled! B CEOs getting shackled! C# Watching actors never reach F# The ending of their oscar speech! F# B Schadenfreude! G C Schadenfreude! F Bb C Schadenfreude! F Bb C Schadenfreude! F F\E The world needs people like you and me D Bb C who've been knocked around by fate. F E 'Cause when people see us, they don't want to be us, D# D and that makes them feel great. G C F E D We provide a vital service to society! Bb C You and me! Schadenfreude! Bb C Making the world a better place... Bb C Making the world a better place... Bb C Making the world a better place... F E D To be! Bb F(STRUM LIKE HELL, JUST FOR FUN!) S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!