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Knock-Off Nigel (Nicky Patterson 2008) Capo IV Chords C, Em, Am V1: If a December stuck in Virgin’s Or the queues in HMV’s Don’t tickle your fancy For those latest DVDs I know a man whose business Is to provide those silver discs With very little overhead But no question of the risks! V2: He doesn’t do dodgy copies Like those one’s done from cinema seats With those silouhettes going to and fro And the constant rustling of sweets! No only deals in retail Or ‘pure belters’ if they’re any good He has no written catalogue Although I really think that he should! V3: His prices are pretty healthy Since he prints the covers too And you get all this for £4 each Or 3 for the price of 2! And his name’s not really Nigel, no Although that’s his true theme tune But he certainly deals in knock-offs He’s a pirate disc tycoon! V4: So to avoid the queues this xmas And the high street’s shopping throng Just send a wee text to Nigel And you surely won’t go wrong! He’s got the new James Bond And High School Musical 7 And as long as you don’t mind the Chinese dubs You’ll be in home-cinema heaven!