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80 Year Old Whore ukulele

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80 Year Old Whore
Written By Adam Dodd

CAPO 3

Intro

C   Am   F   G  

C                     Am
I was walking with my buddies,
    F             G
And saw a few hot chicks,
C                  Am 
But, I wasnt interested in them,
         F                  G
No, they werent the finest picks,
C                        Am 
But, then you caught my attention,
         F                       G
From the window of the old folks place,
C                   Am
Right away I knew I was in love,
       F                        G
When I saw the wrinkles on your face,
F                G
I came inside to meet you,
        C       Em                Am
And you hobbled right through the door,
G
With your walker,


C         Am         F           G
Youre my beautiful, 80 year-old whore,
C                   Am 
I love it that your pubes are grey, 
         F                G
And your boobs sag to the floor,
  C          Em                            
Every time I take out your dentures,
  F              G
I know whats in store,
C                       Am
Its time to clean your dentures,
                 F          G           C
Cause youre my beautiful, 80 year-old whore,

Am   F   G 


C                 Am
Young girls dont turn me on,
F               G
Experience is a must,
C                     Am
Especially when youre 4 foot 8,
         F               G
And your vagina collects dust,
C              Am
When we get to kissin,
    F               G
You wheeze as I get hyper,
C                      Am
And I love it when you pluck your whiskers,
   F               G
As I take off your diaper,
F             G
You ask me to change you,
     C          Em    Am
But, baby, that all depends,
G
Pun intended,


C         Am         F           G
Youre my beautiful, 80 year-old whore,
C                   Am
I love it when your knees give out,
         F                   G
And you fall straight to the floor,
C            Em
Every time I spank that ass,
F                G
You poop in your drawers, 
C           Am
But I dont care at all,
                 F          G           C
Cause youre my beautiful, 80 year-old whore,
 
Am   F   G  


C                   Am
Many nights, well just stay in,
           F                         G
Well eat applesauce and well watch porn,
C                 Am
As I massage your hunchback,
    F               G
And nibble on your corns,
C                Am
Your bones are a creakin,
          F               G
And your arm flab gets me hard,
C                Am
But then the Alzheimers kicks in,
        F                             G
And you dont know where the hell you are,
F               G
During sex you love it,
       C          Em           Am
When I whisper in your hearing aid,
G
I love you, Ethel,


C         Am         F           G
Youre my beautiful, 80 year-old whore,
C                   Am                     F                  G              
I love it when you call 9-1-1 when you get lost in the grocery store,
C                          Em                  Am                      G
And I dont mind you gave Stonewall Jackson a handjob during the Civil War,
C             Am                   F
Cause Im so damn in love with my beautiful, 
G           C
80 year-old whore

Am   F   G   C

THE END.

OFFICIAL WEBSITE - THEADAMDODD.COM
FACEBOOK.COM/ADAMDODDCOMEDY

            
            
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