Down to the Old Pub Instead ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ by Stephen Lynch from ^ÓSuperhero^Ô (2002) Got this from another site, but the words were incomplete so i filled in the gaps...really good song! another irish classic lol! sorry the formattings a bit screwed but thats how i found it. Credit to: Jon Cutright
not me! INTRO: F ^Ö G - F ^Ö G VERSE 1: F G Lad it^Òs your duty to find you a lass F G with child-bearing hips and a pink supple ass F G F G And make her you wife and love her with love so true F G Now, some rivers run high some rivers run low F G When her river runs red then she starting her flow F G F G And it^Òs called menstruation and heres what I means to you Am F You will notice her bloomers are spartie? At first F G Stand back, her ovarian dams gonna burst Am F So don^Òt be afraid it’s a natural thing F G Just wind up some cotton and give her some string F Put the old linens on top of the bed F G get out of the house and go down to the old pub F G F G instead. VERSE 2: F G She^Òll retain her water her breasts will be tender F G And every third word that you say will offend her F G F G Get out of the house and go down to the old pub instead F G And she^Òll want to make love if you do you’re a fool F G Cause you^Òll only end up with a bloody ol’ tool F G F G Get out of the house, down to the old pub instead Am F And she^Òll want you to sample the fruit of her loins F G But son it^Òll taste like some old rusty coins Am F So turn off the lights boy and take off your hat F G And drop to your knees say a prayer to st pat F Then he^Òll give you the strength to get out of the bed F G And for Ireland^Òs sake go down to the old pub F G F G instead. VERSE 3: Am F Now the pub is the place where the lads are a meeting F G When the moon^Òs full and the girls are a bleatin Am F The catholic, the protestant even the pagan F G The pub is the place when lady is raggin F So drink of your pint boys and thank your shamrocks F That as men folk we don^Òt have to bleed from our cocks F And that we can escape from the lady in red F G And get out of the house and go down to the old pub e]------------3--- B]----------3----- G]--------0------- D]------0--------- A]----2----------- E]--3------------- instead.